Life of the College Girl

I Need to Stop….

Posted on: March 4, 2008

I need to stop lettin people get to me. I hate showing weakness,and what I did today was truly weak and ignorant,ghetto,out of pocket,stereotypical black woman shit..so not me. I need to keep myself calm, even though I was quite calm when doing it,crazy,I just need to calm it down. I can’t keep letting people get on my nervous like that. To the point that I just get pissed and start acting stereotypical, because I’m better than that. I shouldn’t be doing anything that will get me kicked out of school, make people think that I am something I’m not,or get myself hurt in anyway. Ok maybe it’s too late now, but not really. People can always change,and I can change, I have changed. Example, I’m going to stop messing with dudes until I go back home. My reasons? Well for one, half these dudes here are just plain disrespectful. Some of them are worse than dudes with this situation, it’s fucking crazy!! Another reason is that a lot of dudes aren’t willing to see me for more than what they saw in the video. They don’t want to meet the real person, they just wanna meet the actions. I’m not a hoe and I don’t wanna be treated like one,so to prevent that from happening, I’m just going to stay away. Another reason is that all the good ones are either taken, not interested in me,or aren’t my type. Not saying that these perfect men aren’t my type ,just that I’m not physically attracted to them,so it won’t work…..

….Speaking of physical attraction, we were talking about love in English today. What are key factors in a successful relationship. I said honesty and physical attraction. Honesty because nothing will work unless BOTH of the people involved are honest. I say just lay everything out on the table in the beginning. Any baby mommas, criminal records,restraining orders, mental status……sex tapes, if you got a second life, or if you have a blog that you write in daily, just put it all out there so there will be no surprises and if you still wanna be with that person then it’s ok,and if you don’t,then that’s great too,but at least they were honest. Personally,if I’m with someone I will want to know everything,and I will tell them everything. Especially if you got a disease,and are planning on be intimate with me. Let me know that shit!!! So I can break up with your ass!!!…lol, kidding, I mean if he cool people and he can get rid of it then we can get something going,just make sure you bring them Trojans,Lifestyles, and Magnums. To all my potential boyfriends that I don’t know about who are reading this. This is as real as it gets, I will never tell a lie up here, promise. I may lie on Facebook,Myspace(i.e. I am not in my 80s),and numerous messageboards, but here…all truth and nothing but it. That’s why I get so raw up here, these are thoughts that have been in my head all day and I just spill it out onto here. I do, however, censor myself. There is a lot of things that I leave out simply because sometimes my thoughts get too raunchy,or violent,so I leave those out. But other than that, it’s all me……

…Anyway, what was I talking about? Oh,relationship traits. Physical attraction. I don’t care what anybody say, if the person ain’t to your likin you are not going to try n holla! Simple as that. I know for me if you are not my type physically, I can’t do it. I’m sorry,but you gotta look like Troy Smith!!! If you don’t look like Troy Smith,don’t come near me!!!! LOL I’m kidding, like really if I thought like that I wouldn’t have no man since more than likely Troy got a girl,and Reggie Bush is with The Kushion aka Miss Princess Kim KardASShian. But for real, I like athletic dudes football players,basketball players,on track runner preferably. But I’ve came to the conclusion that I will have to do some fine tuning on myself to get that type of dude. Start running and shit, get my body together….I’ll start doing that in May/June,be hot for next semester with them Virginia Boys!!!!! Yummy ass VA boys. I didn’t start missing VA boys until I came here…I love them!!!

Anyway, these dudes are missing out on a good thing. I keep telling them that I’m the best for them,but nooooooo I made a sex tape so I’m a super duper truper whore now..lol. I laugh at that shit,because they are stupid as hell!! I mean come on! I made a mistake,everyone does, I acknowledged it and I’m moving on and getting through it. How many girls do you know could go through something like this and still hold her head up high? I don’t have any diseases, contrary to popular belief, I am completely clean(well then again I do have a lil yeas……nevermind, that’s none of ya’ll business, ladies know what I’m talking about…lol…I’ve been stressin and my eating habits soooo…you know). There are a lot of chicks out there with something and not saying a damn thing, didn’t do shit on camera,and I’m getting all the shit. It’s hard as hell being the school whore,everything you do, you’re always going to be the hoe. You can be doing the least hoe-like things,and you still the hoe! It’s ridiculous!!! I swear somebody could be fucking in the bushes,and I walk past just minding my own business and still be the hoe! I’m not even a hoe, what the fuck? It’s funny how a chick can sleep with 20 dudes on campus,and she gets off the hook because I sucked dick on camera,ONCE! Keep in mind, I have never had sex before in my entire life. This shit is stupid, a dude could be fucking a girl with herpes, but as long as she wasn’t caught on camera then it’s all good? THIS SHIT IS RIDICULOUS!!!

Anyway,where was I before I got pissed off? Oh yeah, why I’m a great catch. Well I’m a entrepenuer, though I can’t spell it, I am one. I’m in the process of starting my own clothing store. How many chicks you know who are doing that at 18? And I’m not even a Business major, just a lil ol’sociology major. I hope this store goes well, I really do,so I can rub it in the faces. Be like Yaahh Trick Yaaahh!!! OMG I just quoted Soulja Boy, what the hell is going on!!! Anyway, I just can’t wait,because what will they be doing? Not a damn thing,because they were too busy talking about me to be thinking about anything else. I shouldn’t say that, I wish my haters the best in life!

Also, I’m a sweet person,with great conversation. I can cook,clean.etc. I’ve said this millions of time in previous posts,but whatever. Not too many people read this anyway since I’m done talking down about myself..lol. But yeah anyone interested just holla and if you my type then I’ll get back to you,and if not then we can still be friends…..

I need to finish constructing my new myspace page,but as soon as I’m done I’ll put it up and you can hit me up there,or if you know me on Facebook, you can holla there.

Love You Guys!!!

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1 Response to "I Need to Stop…."

good luck w/ your future endeavors , girl : )

if your store has a website i’m sure to be a customer.

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